News Flash! Chris L. is NOT a Falconer!

[jhausman]

Yes. It's true. Chris has spent years perfecting genetics in a rare parakeet strain that gives them the appearance of being actual birds of prey. He has been seen parading these mutant pseudo-raptors at several falconry meets and even has a new website where he is selling these RaptorKeets! Do not be sucked in by this madman! He will take you for all you are worth!

Now, I must admit, he DOES take a lot of game with these mutant birds of his. And while being beautiful to look at and tame a hell... it's JUST not right! Oh... and I seriously think he might be an alien! Really!

There, I know I will be banned for my first post, so be it... it is out in the open now and I feel much better.

Oh, and I am Jason Hausman. A dude from NC. Many of you know me from IFF. Glad to finally be here. Even though Chris L. threatened me with bodily harm I still managed to stay away. It was the threat of replacing my bad ass Gyr/Peales with one of his raptorkeet mutant clones in the middle of the night that finally won me over. Creepy.

Love you Chris L. - live long and prosper! Nanoo Nanoo and all that crap.

Your bud,

Hausman

[threetoe]

I knew something was wrong....
Teenage Mutant RaptorKeets..

stupd



toungeout

[hawkstir]

LMAO

(welc)

[Jimmy]

Damn..... they let anyone join the group.....

[jhausman]

Damn..... they let anyone join the group.....

Lord knows you just proved that! Wut up Jimmy!? You scurvy dog! rockon

[Jimmy]

:D I'm one of the original rejects, but I thought we had quit letting the new ones join. :D

[wesleyc6]

Lord knows you just proved that! Wut up Jimmy!? You scurvy dog! rockon


Now if we can get the rascally Daren on here!

[chamokane]

Welcome, Jason.

What's it like to fly a large falcon in NC?

[jhausman]

Now if we can get the rascally Daren on here!

You said it Wes! That boy needs to come around! Maybe Chris will threaten him with a mutant raptorkeet clone of his Aplo! That'll get him on here for sure! How are you brother? How's your new dog?

[jhausman]

:D I'm one of the original rejects, but I thought we had quit letting the new ones join. :D

proof that there is some special treatment going on here!

[tacatanach]

Hey Jason, long time no talk

[jhausman]

Welcome, Jason.

What's it like to fly a large falcon in NC?

Ha! Now there is a loaded question if I ever heard it! Let's just say moderately expensive! I will think nothing of driving all over NC to hit the duck ponds. I already have a 10 day hunt set for North Dakota in October and a week in Indiana in February.

But, it CAN be done. HOW do I do it? I stay as far away from RT's and Gos' as I can! If I had one AND a falcon I would fear I would never fly the falcon. So... I just get more falcons! There are farms and there are ponds/ditches, the coast and there ARE ducks here (atlantic flyway). That's enough to get my bird 4-5 good shots on ducks a week. I suspect I will have even more opportunities this next season as my buddy just got a new plane (he is a veteran pilot for military and commercial airlines... and a falconer). Looking forward to the new transportation and finding even more duck spots.

Just seeing my Gyr/Peales roll over at 1000ft+ makes everything worth it. I would move before I gave it up. I am in love with the ol' longwings.

[jhausman]

Hey Jason, long time no talk

No doubt! How are you? How is that little K-Bird doing?

J.

[chamokane]

Ha! Now there is a loaded question if I ever heard it! Let's just say moderately expensive! I will think nothing of driving all over NC to hit the duck ponds. I already have a 10 day hunt set for North Dakota in October and a week in Indiana in February.

But, it CAN be done. HOW do I do it? I stay as far away from RT's and Gos' as I can! If I had one AND a falcon I would fear I would never fly the falcon. So... I just get more falcons! There are farms and there are ponds/ditches, the coast and there ARE ducks here (atlantic flyway). That's enough to get my bird 4-5 good shots on ducks a week. I suspect I will have even more opportunities this next season as my buddy just got a new plane (he is a veteran pilot for military and commercial airlines... and a falconer). Looking forward to the new transportation and finding even more duck spots.

Just seeing my Gyr/Peales roll over at 1000ft+ makes everything worth it. I would move before I gave it up. I am in love with the ol' longwings.

Thanks, Jason. I agree with you that seeing a good falcon do it's thing is worth the effort required. I have to drive about 60 miles before I have a chance to find a slip for one, but the anticipation during the drive is always high.

The only guy that I've actually known from NC was an ex(?) moonshiner I bumped into when I was following hounds. He kept trying to talk me into building a still down in the "holler" behind the house I was living in at the time. He said that place looked just like the hills back home; not longwing country.:D

[jhausman]

Thanks, Jason. I agree with you that seeing a good falcon do it's thing is worth the effort required. I have to drive about 60 miles before I have a chance to find a slip for one, but the anticipation during the drive is always high.

The only guy that I've actually known from NC was an ex(?) moonshiner I bumped into when I was following hounds. He kept trying to talk me into building a still down in the "holler" behind the house I was living in at the time. He said that place looked just like the hills back home; not longwing country.:D

Yeah, the nice thing about NC is that we have all kinds of terrain here. To my left are mountains to my right is the ocean and most everything in between. I just pretty much look for places Merlins are hunting and then see if there is a duck pond then grab my bird and my really cute 6 year old son and walk up to the door with bird on fist and ask if we can fly the pond. Seems to be working for me. My tiercel GP flies wide before coming back at pitch. Gotta have some 'balls' for that around here!

[wesleyc6]

You said it Wes! That boy needs to come around! Maybe Chris will threaten him with a mutant raptorkeet clone of his Aplo! That'll get him on here for sure! How are you brother? How's your new dog?


I am good man. Glad you found the site. The dog did really well this year. The pointing was very so-so, but he loves a rabbit. He ended up being a looker to boot................if you like brown, hairy dogs. He is almost a year old now.

[tacatanach]

No doubt! How are you? How is that little K-Bird doing?

J.

Shes going. Total head count so far is 1 grasshopper and 1 dandlion, but man did she destroy that dandlion. All joking aside she doesnt fly them until the flush and since they are hanging out close to cover that moments hesitation kills her chance. So I've started throwing her and that seems to be working better, she got super close last week but no kill then on the next slip she got blown into a parking sign and brused up one side of her body pretty badly. She was so sore she couldnt fly more than a couple feet before landing. Every day has gotten better- her flying is fine now but that leg on the side is still sore, hopefuly another day or two will be long enough, cause the starlings are taunting me more than ever.

[jhausman]

ouch! that hurts thinking about it! sure she will be back in the swing soon! those starlings need killin'! i have been off for only a month and am already counting the days to next season!!! just glad i have the new breeder aplomado and the tiercel anatum coming. will shorten the off season significantly! my hybrid is rolling into the molt nicely.

keep me posted on things. i am around. thinking falcons and such 24/7 as usual.

[Chris L.]

Jason,
LMAO, man that is a great post. I just cant top it. I love itbeeer

Good to have you here man. I consider you a great friend and its nice to see some more friendly faces on here.

Looking forward to your new aplo! I cant wait to see it.

When I see you guys on the 19th I will see if I can get pastor D to to make a drop in on NAFEX as well.. and maybe that Damn red neck Chip.. Oh wait, Chips on here.. Chip you just have to hit "post reply"... Chip is special, you know short bus special. crazyy

its great to have you here my friend... thanks for the great intro, i knew you wouldn't let me down

[GyrXPeals]

Yes. It's true. Chris has spent years perfecting genetics in a rare parakeet strain that gives them the appearance of being actual birds of prey. He has been seen parading these mutant pseudo-raptors at several falconry meets and even has a new website where he is selling these RaptorKeets! Do not be sucked in by this madman! He will take you for all you are worth!

Now, I must admit, he DOES take a lot of game with these mutant birds of his. And while being beautiful to look at and tame a hell... it's JUST not right! Oh... and I seriously think he might be an alien! Really!
Hausman

Jason now that explains a lot, I thought it was just a joke when Chris ordered a triple split jess extender for one of his birds. Obviously I was wrong. A three legged bird would catch more game. I want to see the bird that's wearing this.
http://i82.photobucket.com/albums/j254/gyrxpeales/ChrisExt.jpg
Jason I got several emails from Darren when you two were thinking about getting your Aplo's, but not a word since you got them. Just curious how they turned out and how you like them.
Glad you're here bud.
Jeff

[jhausman]

Jason,
LMAO, man that is a great post. I just cant top it. I love itbeeer

Good to have you here man. I consider you a great friend and its nice to see some more friendly faces on here.

Looking forward to your new aplo! I cant wait to see it.

When I see you guys on the 19th I will see if I can get pastor D to to make a drop in on NAFEX as well.. and maybe that Damn red neck Chip.. Oh wait, Chips on here.. Chip you just have to hit "post reply"... Chip is special, you know short bus special. crazyy

its great to have you here my friend... thanks for the great intro, i knew you wouldn't let me down

good to be here brother! ;)

[jhausman]

Jason now that explains a lot, I thought it was just a joke when Chris ordered a triple split jess extender for one of his birds. Obviously I was wrong. A three legged bird would catch more game. I want to see the bird that's wearing this.
http://i82.photobucket.com/albums/j254/gyrxpeales/ChrisExt.jpg
Jason I got several emails from Darren when you two were thinking about getting your Aplo's, but not a word since you got them. Just curious how they turned out and how you like them.
Glad you're here bud.
Jeff

I told you! He is an alien. Chris and I were exercising our very rare purple ball pythons at a seedy bar in Columbia (SC) one nite. We drank and drank and drank and finally decided that it was time to walk home (we do not drink and drive). We had hoped to exercise the snakes but there was not much in the way of filly's that nite if you catch my drift.

So... we wander on out into the balmy southeastern night. We didn't get more than a few blocks from the bar before we see some really strange lights from above? They were every color in the rainbow and swirling around in the night sky. I thought it was surely just one too many Guinness' but when I realized Chris saw them too I knew we were seeing something spectacular. The lights continued to move and soon I realized they were getting bigger. Now, this is where my falconry came into play. I thought for a moment and realized that... when my falcons are coming down from overhead they seem to be getting bigger as they get closer! This was a big revelation as drunk as I was, you see. Crap! By the time I realized what was happening it was far too late. Chris and I were beemed up into this strange lab where the nurses were actually pretty. Green skinned... but hot in that James T. Kirk kinda way. You know. A soft glow around the face makes a difference! WELL!! I see knives and needles and I start getting all freaked out. Then one of the green hotties gives me a kiss and I black out.

I "come to" (apparently) two days later in an ally.... naked.

Chris is nowhere to be found. I wander the streets of Columbia for several days. Starving, naked and well... pretty freaked out! No Chris to be found. Nothing. I finally make it to his house and when I knock on the door one of the Green Hottie Chics opens the door!!!!! Except she is not green anymore! She looks... human! Chris causally walks up behind her and says... "what's up with the naked thing dude?"

I say, you know darn well what is up with it! You both do! He says " I have no earthly idea what you are talking about hausman" This is when I realize what is going on. See... Aliens can't lie.... it's a fact! Seriously, I read it online once. So... being a highly intelligent mofo - I read into that sentence... "I have no EARTHLY idea..."!!!!!

See... being not of this earth anymore (you know, an alien impostor!) The Alien-Chris was not telling a lie when he said he had no EARTHLY idea!

No matter how I tried, the Alien-Chris could not be tricked into admitting he was, in fact, not Chris. He swore he had no memory of the event... and the hottie girl just stood there smiling at me purple python... too creepy.

So that's the story of how I was abducted by aliens, stranded naked in Columbia for several days and lost my good friend Chris to those Green alien women. That's the story I told my wife and I am sticking to it!!!!

That's why Chris has a three legged bird. Cause he is Chris no more!

Hausman

[Lee Slikkers]

Chris and I were exercising our very rare purple ball pythons...
Hausman
I was glad there was more to this story when it started out with this line :eek: I was getting a bit nervous for Chris & you!

:D

[Chris L.]

J,
I told you only take one hit of the acid, but no you had to the big man and take 3 and then dabble in the peyote as a chaser!!

that will learn ya!

[Chris L.]

Jason now that explains a lot, I thought it was just a joke when Chris ordered a triple split jess extender for one of his birds. Obviously I was wrong. A three legged bird would catch more game. I want to see the bird that's wearing this.
http://i82.photobucket.com/albums/j254/gyrxpeales/ChrisExt.jpg
.
Jeff

Jeff,
Still waiting on that system.. its hard to control that third leg!! frus.. Now where in the hell did my green hottie go!

[GyrXPeals]

Jeff,
Still waiting on that system.. its hard to control that third leg!! frus.. Now where in the hell did my green hottie go!
PMSL Chris, I'll just send you the binary code for the design, that green hottie should be able to reprogram her food replicator and make it for you out of spaghetti noodles.
ATB,
Jeff
PS: that green hottie should know what to do with that third leg.

[Jimmy]

Chris is nowhere to be found. I wander the streets of Columbia for several days. Starving, naked and well... pretty freaked out! No Chris to be found.


I'd be a little concerned, Chris...... It appears you have a queer stalker. And if that wasn't bad enough, he wants to play with your purple balls.:eek:

[tacatanach]

ouch! that hurts thinking about it! sure she will be back in the swing soon! those starlings need killin'! i have been off for only a month and am already counting the days to next season!!! just glad i have the new breeder aplomado and the tiercel anatum coming. will shorten the off season significantly! my hybrid is rolling into the molt nicely.

keep me posted on things. i am around. thinking falcons and such 24/7 as usual.

Yeah it looked pretty painful. She had been getting better, but this morning she seemed like it was bugging her more that normal- could just be since she was flying more (and therefore landing more on it), but I made her a vet apt just to be safe. First available isnt til monday afternoon though :( she seems fine most of the time but if she trys to do any real preening or tuck her head on the block she looses her balance and falls off. Shes better on a bow but i think thats just fixing the symptom not addressing the problem. So shes been in the GH so shes not landing on it and also she can lean against the sides or front if she needs to catch herself.

[Eagle Owl]

I told you! He is an alien. Chris and I were exercising our very rare purple ball pythons at a seedy bar in Columbia (SC) one nite. We drank and drank and drank and finally decided that it was time to walk home (we do not drink and drive). We had hoped to exercise the snakes but there was not much in the way of filly's that nite if you catch my drift....

Jason, that has to be one of teh funniest things I have read in a long time!!! I am very glad that you survived your ordeal! crazyy

[NCFalconer]

Holy Moses: No wonder my life has been so tame lately: I lost touch with all you rejects! What a gaggle: Chris, Jason, Okie Jeff, GA Jimmy, my buddy the TX PreacherMan, et al. Dang! I've been missing all the fun! It's nice to be back in the fold.

Daren

[FredFogg]

Holy Moses: No wonder my life has been so tame lately: I lost touch with all you rejects! What a gaggle: Chris, Jason, Okie Jeff, GA Jimmy, my buddy the TX PreacherMan, et al. Dang! I've been missing all the fun! It's nice to be back in the fold.

Daren

About time you got on here! :D

[jhausman]

Holy Moses: No wonder my life has been so tame lately: I lost touch with all you rejects! What a gaggle: Chris, Jason, Okie Jeff, GA Jimmy, my buddy the TX PreacherMan, et al. Dang! I've been missing all the fun! It's nice to be back in the fold.

Daren

The scary part is his admitting that he knows us!!!! amennn

[NCFalconer]

Oh man, now you're scaring me. Fred is on this list, so is Baine, and you even let some of the infamous Outlaw DirtHawkers from Texas on it. Next thing you know Chip will pop up. I KNOW I need to repent concerning the company I keep!

Daren

[jhausman]

Oh man, now you're scaring me. Fred is on this list, so is Baine, and you even let some of the infamous Outlaw DirtHawkers from Texas on it. Next thing you know Chip will pop up. I KNOW I need to repent concerning the company I keep!

Daren

Far too late for you brother. You have given in to the dark side! Plus you fly a longwing. You are completely doomed. :eek:

J.

[FredFogg]

Oh man, now you're scaring me. Fred is on this list, so is Baine, and you even let some of the infamous Outlaw DirtHawkers from Texas on it. Next thing you know Chip will pop up. I KNOW I need to repent concerning the company I keep!

Daren

Hey, what is this "company you are keeping" crap, I haven't seen you in over a year! I was beginning to wonder if Jason hadn't whacked you over the head down in a ditch somewhere and has just been telling us you have been busy! LOL

[wesleyc6]

Whooohooo, it's Daren. Sorry to tell you guys, but Daren is a preacher too:D Maybe they will forgive ya Daren;)

Well take a month or two and read all the back posts. LOL

How about a pic of your falcon(s)?

[jhausman]

Hey, what is this "company you are keeping" crap, I haven't seen you in over a year! I was beginning to wonder if Jason hadn't whacked you over the head down in a ditch somewhere and has just been telling us you have been busy! LOL

yeah. and now i am posting for him! i am sneaky like that.

[Eagle Owl]

Oh man, now you're scaring me. Fred is on this list, so is Baine, and you even let some of the infamous Outlaw DirtHawkers from Texas on it. Next thing you know Chip will pop up. I KNOW I need to repent concerning the company I keep!

Daren

TODs rock!!! :D rockon

[FredFogg]

How about a pic of your falcon(s)?

Hey Wes, I have heard about this falcon he has, but I am beginning to think he just made it up! I have never seen it! LOL crazyy :D

[jhausman]

How about a pic of your falcon(s)?

His bird is too purdy for a camera and won't sit still long enough to be painted properly.

J.

[FredFogg]

yeah. and now i am posting for him! i am sneaky like that.

Hey, we all know how computer savy you are! Now if you can just get into his bank account and get the keys to that airplane! ROFLMAO toungeout

[jhausman]

Hey, we all know how computer savy you are! Now if you can just get into his bank account and get the keys to that airplane! ROFLMAO toungeout

he just dropped off a set to me today in fact! once an apprentice always an apprentice i suppose. wants me to go wax it for him this weekend. confusedd

[FredFogg]

he just dropped off a set to me today in fact! once an apprentice always an apprentice i suppose. wants me to go wax it for him this weekend. confusedd

Uh Oh, Wax On, Wax Off, Wax On, Wax Off, just watch out for that Dragon Butterfly move he will want you to learn! LOL

[NCFalconer]

OK, Jason admit it and quit sendng e-mails in my name and signing my signature to stuff, acting like you're me.

And if you don't quit it, I'll make you preach for me next Sunday! Nahhh...Never mind; the congregation wouldn't even notice the difference. Same stories about hawks and squirrels and weirdo falconers. LOL

Daren

[FredFogg]

OK, Jason admit it and quit sendng e-mails in my name and signing my signature to stuff, acting like you're me.

And if you don't quit it, I'll make you preach for me next Sunday! Nahhh...Never mind; the congregation wouldn't even notice the difference. Same stories about hawks and squirrels and weirdo falconers. LOL

Daren

Yeah Daren, I have been wondering where you were getting your ideas for your sermons since you haven't been hanging out with us falconers. You always said you had lots of ideas after a day with us! :eek:

[NCFalconer]

Yeah Daren, I have been wondering where you were getting your ideas for your sermons since you haven't been hanging out with us falconers. You always said you had lots of ideas after a day with us! :eek:

Yeah, well, I made one trip out to Ft Worth and went hawking with some of those Texas guys and came back with TONS of sermon illustrations! And I did see Chip once or twice, which is always good for a dozen or so. And don't forget the permanent apprentice who lives in Charlotte. Man, my church members keep asking me to pleeeeze bring the bald, pierced, tattooed, rock musician/falconry apprentice to church someday. They really think I am making up the things I tell them about him.

[FredFogg]

And don't forget the permanent apprentice who lives in Charlotte. Man, my church members keep asking me to pleeeeze bring the bald, pierced, tattooed, rock musician/falconry apprentice to church someday. They really think I am making up the things I tell them about him.

Yeah, I can imagine that 2 years during the apprenticeship gave you 10 years worth of sermons! amennn haillhaillhaill LOL

[Chris L.]

Holy Moses: No wonder my life has been so tame lately: I lost touch with all you rejects! What a gaggle: Chris, Jason, Okie Jeff, GA Jimmy, my buddy the TX PreacherMan, et al. Dang! I've been missing all the fun! It's nice to be back in the fold.

Daren

Daren,
Hey man... GREAT to have you on here. Its about time you Nc boys made it!. Chip is on here as well, his okie ass cant figure out how to use the mouse crazyy

I haven't seen you in a while! How is everything? I didnt know you flew a plane? what do you fly?

your going the 19th right? I hope you are. It will be good to see you.

Glad you made it over to NAFEX, dont expect much with some of the names you dropped being on here.. you've been warned :D

[Lee Slikkers]

yeah. and now i am posting for him! i am sneaky like that.

At least he didn't show up here naked with a purple python!

[NCFalconer]

Hey Chris. Yes, I'll be at the NCFG event on the 19th, so I look fwd to seeing you. It's been a while!

I am currently flying a little single engine 4 place airplane called a Diamond DA40. Love it!
It makes trips to Texas infinitely more do-able; saves me about 16 hours of driving time each way! It's small but fast and fuel efficient.

I am hoping it'll also make our falconry a bit more exciting as we can travel longer distances to get to good areas for game. (Not enough ducks and quail here!!)

Daren

[Chris L.]

I am currently flying a little single engine 4 place airplane called a Diamond DA40. Love it!
It makes trips to Texas infinitely more do-able; saves me about 16 hours of driving time each way! It's small but fast and fuel efficient.

I am hoping it'll also make our falconry a bit more exciting as we can travel longer distances to get to good areas for game. (Not enough ducks and quail here!!)

Daren

Daren,
I have been wanting to get my pilots license for a while. I hope to do that in the near future for sure. I will pick your brain about it on the 19th.. hope you dont mind crazyy :D

Anytime you are ready, I am for sure.. I got the fuel tab!!! Post a picture of her,if you have one..

again good to have both of you guys on here.

[FredFogg]

Hey Chris. Yes, I'll be at the NCFG event on the 19th, so I look fwd to seeing you. It's been a while!

I am currently flying a little single engine 4 place airplane called a Diamond DA40. Love it!
It makes trips to Texas infinitely more do-able; saves me about 16 hours of driving time each way! It's small but fast and fuel efficient.

I am hoping it'll also make our falconry a bit more exciting as we can travel longer distances to get to good areas for game. (Not enough ducks and quail here!!)

Daren

Daren, you can drag my sorry butt to Texas with you anytime you want! LOL haillhaillhaill

[jhausman]

OK, Jason admit it and quit sendng e-mails in my name and signing my signature to stuff, acting like you're me.

And if you don't quit it, I'll make you preach for me next Sunday! Nahhh...Never mind; the congregation wouldn't even notice the difference. Same stories about hawks and squirrels and weirdo falconers. LOL

Daren

so true so true. did i take that picture of sophie?

[jhausman]

Daren, you can drag my sorry butt to Texas with you anytime you want! LOL haillhaillhaill

i guess i need to state this for the record. daren... i got shotgun on the plane. period. end of story. period. that's it. done. four seats... two falconers (me... daren) and the birds. finito. boxingg

[FredFogg]

i guess i need to state this for the record. daren... i got shotgun on the plane. period. end of story. period. that's it. done. four seats... two falconers (me... daren) and the birds. finito. boxingg

Someones mommy didn't teach him how to share! ROFLMAO :D

[jhausman]

Someones mommy didn't teach him how to share! ROFLMAO :D

fred,

didn't you know?

i was born without a mother and raised by wolves.

[NCFalconer]

Chris, you better check fuel prices before you get hooked on flying! It is definitely an addictive hobby...but AvGas 100LLL is running about $4.65 per gallon. Outrageous. It adds up to lots of nickels when you're burning 10 gallons per hour!

Jason, you're right: your name is already embroidered on the co-pilot's seat.

[FredFogg]

Chris, you better check fuel prices before you get hooked on flying! It is definitely an addictive hobby...but AvGas 100LLL is running about $4.65 per gallon. Outrageous. It adds up to lots of nickels when you're burning 10 gallons per hour!

Jason, you're right: your name is already embroidered on the co-pilot's seat.

Daren

Co-Pilot pays for the gas! It is all yours Jason! LOL toungeouttoungeouttoungeout

[Chris L.]

fred,

didn't you know?

i was born without a mother and raised by wolves.

LOL.. man you need help crazyy LMAO


Chris, you better check fuel prices before you get hooked on flying! It is definitely an addictive hobby...but AvGas 100LLL is running about $4.65 per gallon. Outrageous. It adds up to lots of nickels when you're burning 10 gallons per hour!

Jason, you're right: your name is already embroidered on the co-pilot's seat.

Daren

Darren,
yeah, fuel is crazy now for sure. All in good time.

Hell I will take the isle, I don't care!!

[jhausman]

what? i was serious. is that a problem for you? we can't be pals now cause of a little thing like my being raise by wolves? wow. this forum is a bit "tight" for my blood.

J.